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SOME FLYING FICKLE FINGER OF FATE STORIES!
Bad Day
One moment, Justin Hill was turning into his driveway. Minutes later he was being flown to a hospital as his home went up in flames. Then he got a traffic ticket. Hill got into a crash after turning into the path of an oncoming car, said Tennessee Highway Patrol Officer Monte Terry. Hill's wife heard the crash and ran outside, leaving the kitchen stove, where she had been cooking, unattended. Within minutes, their Rock Island trailer was on fire, and firefighters who had responded to the accident found themselves fighting the blaze. The rural central Tennessee home had extensive damage. Hill was treated at the hospital and released, but he was cited in the accident for failure to yield.
****I don’t want to be standing next to this guy during a thunderstorm!!!
***But wait a minute!
***He saved a lot of money on his car insurance by switching to Geico!
Self Torture
A London man has made a film documenting his quest to track down his ex-girlfriends and find out why they broke up with him. Chris Waitt, who said he has been dumped by every girl he's dated since he was 11 years old, said he tracked down his exes and interviewed them for his documentary, "A Complete History Of My Sexual Failures.” "Girls don't usually tell you at the time," Waitt said of their reasons for breaking up with him. "When you actually get dumped they'll say, 'Oh, I just want to be friends.' Or 'I really like you, but...' They never tell you the real reasons." Dawn, Waitt's childhood sweetheart and the woman he lost his virginity to, blamed the breakup on his behavior at a wedding. "We went to a wedding and he got really (drunk)... and he jammed my mom up against a door and kissed her. I didn't know what to do. It was horrible," she said.
****And he’s wondering why she broke up with him?????
***The name of the documentary will be “How I Discovered That I’m a Real Jerk!”
Some interesting quotes from environmentalists over the years:
“The threat of a new ice age must now stand alongside nuclear war as a likely source of wholesale death and misery for mankind.”-Nigel Calder, addressing the first Earth Day rally in 1969
“Civilization will end within 15 to 20 years unless immediate action is taken against the problems facing mankind.”-Harvard biologist George Wald, 1970
“By 1995, somewhere between 75 and 85 percent of all species of living animals will be extinct.”-Senator Gaylord Nelson, 1970 in Look Magazine
THESE GUYS ARE ALL DEAD… AND WE’RE STILL HERE! Get the picture? See you tomorrow… GB |
